Our lives have run in parallel from the time I was 14. We are the sun and the moon chasing each other like fools. We keep circling one another year after year but are always so far apart.
Every once in a while our paths converge and we hold each other in an embrace. At that moment my world goes dark and it’s like I’ve disappeared for a moment. I tell you how much I miss you and then we part once again so that my light can shine once more here on earth.
In the absence of you, I picture myself floating to you in my mind.
Countless times I have traveled to an imaginary world where we could be together in a way that doesn’t leave my world dark. Where you could hold me dearly in your arms and stare lovingly into my eyes. Where I could bring you my rainbow and fill your soul with joy. Where we could love one another unconditionally. Where I could feel wanted and cherished every day.
To this end, I summon your face at night, reliving scenes from our past and moments that never were; moments shared that transcend physical presence. I live in a strange duplicity: the life I live in my body and the one I live in my mind.
When I once had you in my arms we lay next to one another—you with your arms wrapped around my middle, gently feeling my stomach while dreaming of our unborn children. How strange that was for me. At the time I lacked the words to say it, but I was not ready to receive the love you were ready and willing to give to me.
So I pushed you away. Like I always do, I faded away, taking with me the spectrum of colours that lit up your world.
Did I leave you living in the grey? Is that the source of you unhappiness?
Or, does the thought of me living on another planet brighten your day as thoughts of you continue to illuminate mine?
Oh, Man on the Moon, how long will we be worlds apart, still gazing longingly into each other’s eyes from across the cosmos?
Only the sands of time will tell.
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